"Alone"
By The Blood & The Bones
in those days after
I realized the war you had waged
alone how you hated yourself
the way you did not fit now
the things you’d done
but I loved you
although it must not have been
nearly enough
I see that now
in the dawn
in the boots left unworn by the door
in the blood
where was the you from before?
the one who gave me his name
the one who held a reason
to battle the mind
is to be flanked by your own regrets it is to endure a soundless
violent
massacre
I did not know
you went on ahead but I could not break through the gates
and these hands
these hands that held you often
reaching
bearing down around metal that will not give
as you bore down on metal of your own
the sound of it, even now, it echoes
I come undone
I could not go with you
even if you’d allowed me to
but I would have tried
if I had known
in the end
it was you who would win
and you who would lose
and now it’s me
who goes to war
alone
The Blood and the Bones is the pseudonym for a former lover of a US servicemember. Follow her here.
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